# Goddesses in Everywoman: Tags: #literature ## Metadata * Author: [Jean Shinoda Bolen M.D.](https://www.amazon.comundefined) * ASIN: B00134XEPU * Reference: https://www.amazon.com/dp/B00134XEPU * [Kindle link](kindle://book?action=open&asin=B00134XEPU) ## Highlights The expectations of the child’s family support some goddesses and suppress others. — location: [581](kindle://book?action=open&asin=B00134XEPU&location=581) ^ref-26863 --- The child’s inherent goddess pattern interacts with family expectations. If the family disapproves of the specific goddess, however, a girl doesn’t stop feeling the way she does, although she may learn not to act naturally and her self-esteem suffers. — location: [587](kindle://book?action=open&asin=B00134XEPU&location=587) ^ref-27483 --- If her family rewards and encourages a girl to develop what comes naturally, she feels good about herself as she goes about doing what matters to her. — location: [593](kindle://book?action=open&asin=B00134XEPU&location=593) ^ref-39423 --- Opposition doesn’t change the inherent pattern, it just makes the girl feel bad about herself for having the traits and interests she has. And it makes her feel inauthentic if she pretends to be other than she is. — location: [594](kindle://book?action=open&asin=B00134XEPU&location=594) ^ref-55178 --- Women’s lives are shaped by the allowable roles and idealized images of the time. — location: [609](kindle://book?action=open&asin=B00134XEPU&location=609) ^ref-47966 --- For example, the baby boom that followed World War II emphasized marriage and motherhood. This was a fulfilling time for women who had Hera’s need to be a mate, and for women with Demeter’s maternal instinct. It was a difficult time for Athena or Artemis women who were intellectually curious and competitive and wanted to express excellence or achievement at any other task other than raising a family. — location: [610](kindle://book?action=open&asin=B00134XEPU&location=610) ^ref-32742 seems we have swung quite a bit in the other direction --- When specific archetypal patterns in some women find favor in the culture, those women can do what is inwardly meaningful to them and can receive outer approval. Institutional support matters greatly. — location: [620](kindle://book?action=open&asin=B00134XEPU&location=620) ^ref-42812 --- The saying “Doing is becoming” expresses a way that goddesses can be evoked or developed by a chosen course of action. — location: [662](kindle://book?action=open&asin=B00134XEPU&location=662) ^ref-57484 --- The ancient Greeks knew something we can learn: goddesses can be imagined and then invoked. — location: [682](kindle://book?action=open&asin=B00134XEPU&location=682) ^ref-15450 --- It is possible to “invoke” that goddess, by consciously making an effort to see, feel, or sense her presence—to bring her into focus through the imagination—and then ask for her particular strength. — location: [685](kindle://book?action=open&asin=B00134XEPU&location=685) ^ref-62411 --- As in every other stage of life, the outcome for the individual depends on the activated goddesses in her psyche, the realities of her situation, and the choices she makes. — location: [707](kindle://book?action=open&asin=B00134XEPU&location=707) ^ref-65202 --- The virgin goddess aspect is that part of a woman that is unowned by or “unpenetrated” by a man—that is untouched by her need for a man or need to be validated by him, that exists wholly separate from him, in her own right. When a woman is living out a virgin archetype, it means that a significant part of her is psychologically virginal, not that she is physically and literally virginal. — location: [718](kindle://book?action=open&asin=B00134XEPU&location=718) ^ref-36621 --- “A woman who is virgin, one-in-herself, does what she does—not because of any desire to please, not to be liked, or to be approved, even by herself; not because of any desire to gain power over another, to catch his interest or love, but because what she does is true. — location: [733](kindle://book?action=open&asin=B00134XEPU&location=733) ^ref-17442 --- If a woman is one-in-herself, she will be motivated by a need to follow her own inner values, to do what has meaning or fulfills herself, apart from what other people think. — location: [738](kindle://book?action=open&asin=B00134XEPU&location=738) ^ref-61800 --- Artemis as Goddess of the Hunt and Goddess of the Moon was a personification of an independent feminine spirit. The archetype she represents enables a woman to seek her own goals on terrain of her own choosing. — location: [946](kindle://book?action=open&asin=B00134XEPU&location=946) ^ref-1634 --- Her identity and sense of worth is based on who she is and what she does, rather than whether she is married, or to whom. — location: [953](kindle://book?action=open&asin=B00134XEPU&location=953) ^ref-27215 --- Artemis has a tendency to feel strongly about her causes and principles. She may have come to the defense of someone smaller or may fervently assert “That’s not fair!” before embarking on some campaign to right a wrong. — location: [1040](kindle://book?action=open&asin=B00134XEPU&location=1040) ^ref-16988 --- Opposition and disapproval may harm her self-esteem and self-confidence, especially if her admired father criticizes her for not being ladylike and never treats her like “his special girl,” while at the same time being contemptuous or critical of her ideas, abilities, or aspirations. — location: [1062](kindle://book?action=open&asin=B00134XEPU&location=1062) ^ref-20518 --- In my practice, I hear what happened when such fathers opposed their Artemis daughters. Typically, the daughter maintained a defiant pose outwardly but inwardly was wounded. She appeared to be strong, uninfluenced by what he thought, biding her time until she could be on her own. The consequences vary in intensity and severity, but follow a pattern: what results is a woman who feels conflict about her competence and often sabotages herself—her own doubts are her worst enemies. Although on the surface she successfully resisted her father’s power to limit her aspirations, she incorporated his critical attitude into her psyche. Deep down, she struggles with feelings that she is not good enough, hesitates when new opportunities are offered, achieves less than she is capable of, and, even when she succeeds, still feels inadequate. — location: [1064](kindle://book?action=open&asin=B00134XEPU&location=1064) ^ref-33509 ---